"Stay the Course" LaLa --Part II

In our history-wide search for

The Lemming Idol,

for the "Stay the Course" leader
who most deserves the coveted prize, namely,
the Lemming Appreciation o' Leadership Award
(the LaLa), we came upon a fundamental truth:
The Lead to the Ledge is not a function of the "Who",
but rather of the Times and of the Missed Turns along the Road of History.

Almost all Leaders are "Stay the Course" ones.

It is those who by ill chance, fall into the lead just as the course of history hits an inflection point, who become acursed.
It is they who must bear the "Mark of Cain", the "blame" for having been a bad leader in a time of "crisis", when in truth almost all leaders would have done the same.

It was not Cain's fault that he saw not the shift
away from a man-powered vegeterian life style
(being a tiller of the soil, a life style he considered "non-negotiable")
to an alternate life style that his rancher brother, Abel, was adopting.

No wonder that Cain became enraged with jealousy when the animal-powered, rancher life-style (sheep herding) outdid the old ways of the soil tiller. Cain had missed an inflection point in the marketplace. He lashed out in the only way he knew how. He liquidated some of his human assets. And for that he was punished with the fickle pointing finger of "blame", with the Mark of Cain forever imprinted as his exclusive trademark.

(The real Abel, by the way did not disappear. He came out of bankruptcy under a new trade name, Seth. The Sethians flourished. They domesticated yet more of the beasts beyond just the sheep. They learned to work with copper and iron. They yoked the oxen and bade them to do all manner of man's work. In time, the beasts of burden were replaced by a petro-powered progeny that made the children of Cain, Abel and Seth more "productive" than they had ever been before. They felt as if they had gained "dominion" over the earth and the sky. Dazzled by their own brilliance, by the unbounded power of an Abel human mind, they were ready to rocket on to new conquests. They had lost sight of where all the energy had come from. Their self-esteeming inner light blinded them from seeing the next inflection point (the "Peak") a coming their way. It deluded them into belieivng that the marketplace, the worship of a Smithian God, will always provide. None was his brother's keeper and each clawed and tunneled only for his own self gain. But that is a story for another day.)

It is only the rare and brilliant leader who realizes we are at a point of inflection in the affairs of things and who can turn the herd and guide them away from the cliff.

And what, we ask you, is the reward of such a leader? The herd barely notices. Fame goes to those who lead the glorious charge over the ledge, to Pearl Harbor and beyond. Glory comes to those who edge the millions to their deaths under the guise of an "unavoidable" war against an "evil" enemy, or a "catastrophic" turn of events that no one could have foreseen, not even Cassandra.

Lemming Leadership Award Categories

Tis the season to hand out awards.

The humans worship their Great Pretenders (a.k.a. "actors"). Soon they will be passing out golden ape statues (a.k.a. "Oscars") to each other for having fooled themselves into believing that something fake (staged) is actually real. It is the ultimate achievement of the human brain to celebrate fakery, delusion and denial in such magnificent style. We lemmings applaud them.

Not to be out done, we hand out Lemming Appreciation of Leadership Awards.

The Golden Rodent statue is not passed out on whim or whip of a tail. Each category deserves great consideration before we acknowledge a ledge mate who has led the charge for glory and a new dawn (or for a cliff down or a river drown).

Categories for LALA's (Lemming Appreciation o' Leadership Awards) are many. Most coveted is the STC-LALA: the "Stay The Course"-Lemming Appreciation o' Leadership Award.

We lemmings are very egalaterian. Any human, animal or extra-terrestrial, who led a large portion of his/her species toward the edge or beyond can qualify for a "Stay the Course" LALA. There are so many worthy candidates to choose from, past, present and fictional.

Nominations are now open and subdivided among a number of important categories: (1) Politicians, (2) Cult Leaders, (3) Biblical Figures, (4) Business Leaders (5) Entertainment Leaders, and (6) TBD: To Be Determined

Evolution of the Herd / Mob Instinct

There was a time when the human species was small in population and faced attack from predatory animals.

Evolution then favored those who possesed genes that fostered the Herd / Mob instinct.

The weak and isolated apes would gather into a frenzied mob and hurl stones at the attacking carnivore.

Had each primate engaged in rational thought about danger to the self, the mob would have never formed. Evolution found a way to reward those whose genes allowed mob mentality to override rational thought.

That was then. This is now.

We see in the picture to the right, a mob of humans attacking Egyptian police officials because a ferry sank and loved ones were lost in February 2006. The mob attack will not bring the loved ones back. The mob attack will not drive away predatory carnivores.

And yet it is there. Deeply etched into the makeup of the human critters.

Genes that once worked to preserve the species now drive it over the edge.

Wowo Wee ! Only Lemmies Stampee-d

According to an updated Forbes report, at least 73 of the human creatures have been counted as dead.

It was the desire for private wealth, for winnning the WOWwo WEE lottery that drove them into the maddening frenzy.

Meanwhile, in another story relating to human over population, the chase for survival and for earning a living in this mad, mad world, the British Telegraph reports over 1000 human critters killed in mass drowning incident. We Lemmings empathize with you humans. Many of us die in stampedes, mass drownings and other over-the-ledge runs for survival's sake. I guess we share many attributes, no?

Chronicles of Nary-a-Sheehania

The children feel safe when they know that those with courage to stand up for truth and justice are on board.

And so it came to be on the eve of the Emperor's State of the Empire Speech that the Robed Ward entered the magical chamber to join forces with the Lion Defender of Ly'in and Spy'in and to do battle against the White Witch of Sheehania.

The Witch of Sheehania was always bitching about her lost boy. She failed to see the magic of Christmas and of the White Washing. Her T-Shirt was dark and carried a gruesome number: 2,245, the number of the beast.

Our children need to be protected from such horrid realities. So the Lion sent his forces of good up into the Galleries to remove the thou-protest'ith too much Witch from the festivities.

Praised be the Lord and the Lion. The Emperor's speech came to be delivered without a hint of the Witch's Warnings. The children went to sleep happy and safe that night.

And the Generals proudly wore their We-Don't-Symbolize-Anything Costumes. All in all, it was alovely evening.

She wore an Incy Binci, Anti-War Bikini to the President's Ball Last Night

They arrested Cinderella Sheehan for trying to wear a pinko anti-war T-shirt under her conservative debutant's costume while attending the President's Oil Barrons' Banquet last night by invitation.

On first blush, that sounds fair and balanced. After all, who is she to wear an outfit that sends a policy-challenging message for all the "common people" to see? (Big deal that her son died for the "Noble Cause".)

On the other hand, there were lots of other folk at the Bush SOTUS Banquet wearing all kinds of funny, policy-supporting costumes. There were soldiers garnished in hawkish Army and Navy costumes. There were Supreme Court judges robed in fake, fair and balanced togas. It was just Cinderella's obtrusive fashion message that was adjudged out of style. Maybe it was Cinderella's slippers? Perhaps they were magical glass ones that out-shined the Emperor's Robes?

Sheehan story with photos here

Regaining Our Reign

Sometimes, We the People, forget who owns the powers and gave "limited" amounts, with checks, balances and right of reclamation to them who think they can re-attain "Nobility" by threat of terror, by proclamation of "inherent" powers, or by other means of mental manipulation and evasion.

State of the Neo-Con Fusion State

I appreciate ya all came here ta hear talk bout the state of our Union. I looked inta the eyes of our Union and Ah found goodness there. So it's good. It's all good. Those of ya that got more improtant things ta do now, like catching the latest Nascar race scores, well ya can get along now dogs cause I already told ya it's all good. I do this under my inherent and unitary powers as Commander and Chief of the Universe. So when I speak, ya know it's basically as good as God speakin ta ya all. I appreciate that you took time to listen and the Higher Father appreciates it too. Now I also appreciate that some of you might not fully appreciate it when I tell you everything is good. Some of you might have unpatriotic thoughts about our victory in Iraq. Some of you might have uncountryman-like thoughts about our handling of Katrina. Some of you might unconstitutionally question my picks for the Supreme Court. Sure we have had some tough times, but the State of our Union is getting better all the time. These are opportunities and I aim to take advantage, to spend my political capital on these opportunities. I aim to challenge TERROR-IZM wherever it rears it's ugly head. Behind you. See? I made you look. Deep in your heart of hearts you know the fear lurks there. Karl told me to take advantage of your most primitive fears and I appreciate what Karl says. I see TERROR-IZM. I see TERROR-IZM everywhere. Seeing TERROR-IZM everywhere is good fur ya. It sharpens the mind and dulls the wit. We've got to be united and strong in our world wide fight aginst all this TERROR-IZM. We've got to have a coalition of the willing and the patriotic to stand up to all this TERROR-IZM. We are the YOU-KNIGHTED STATES of AM-erica and we will not be pushed around. We will find TERROR-IZM wherever we choose to find it and we will preemptivley strike out against the TERROR-IZM over there so we don't have to fight it over here. All this is logic pure and simple. I appreciate that some of ya think yar intellectuals. Some of ya think yar smarter than me. John Kerry thought he was smarter than me. But he hadn't played Cowboys and Intellectual Heads against me. He didn't realize that he was going to vote for me after he thought he voted against me. He should of talked to my friends at Diebold. They would of told him. So you see my friends. The Sate of Union is good. Good Night and God Bless (me).

Born to be What you are

We blame others for being what they are.

But did they have a choice?

Did they choose to be what they are or was most of it preordained by the birth lottery? Did they pick their parents? Did they pick the culture they would be brought up in? Did they pick the religion they would follow? Did they pick the history that surrounds them? Did they pick the framework in which they see the world?

So why do we blame them (and not ourselves)? Why do we fail to understand that they are victims of their circumstances much as we are of our own?

Their Eyes Glazed Over

Course of course this web blog is kind of a joke. We pretend to be lemmings, intelligent lemming scientists who study the human creatures.

Those humans remind us of us. After all, they are mammals with herd instincts just like our own. They run around under the illusion that they are "intelligent". They "burrow" themselves into a hole in order to build solid communities of prosperity. They overbreed, go crazy, and start a stampede ....

How did this investigation into the lemming-human connection start?

Someone on one of the peak oil sites wrote of their attempt to communicate with fellow creatures about Peak Oil

"Their eyes glazed over," is the way that poster explained it. That got me started. Why? Why do their eyes glaze over? That is one of the questions this web blog explores.

Lemmings are we.

Loosening the Manacles of Manic Manipulation

On the Morning after "Nutcracker" Magic, the eye blinks open wondering if it was merely a dream, or more so, a well scripted stage show whose splendor now shatters like brittle ice crystals struck by a rising day's sun.

Some say America is Awakening.

The Shock and Awe of 9/11 is gone.

Fear of Fear has become just a tiresome Clockwork of so many Codes Orange and Red rather than a dazzling rainbow of post-storm hallucinations.

The bullhorn pulpit is gone.

A spotlight shines instead on missions promised but not accomplished.

So many billions gone and nothing to show for it.

America realizes she had been in the grips of a Manic Manipulator.

Now the seductive shackles of blind faith in a resolute leader come undone. We ask ourselves. "What have we wrought? Have we become the Destroyer of World?"

Christmissed Messages

The GOSPEL of GEORGE:

Preemptively do onto thy neighbors
Before they doo ith a thing onto you

Forgive them oh Higher Father
For they know not what I do.
(But I know what they do,
For I spy'eth secretly upon them.
Executive privilege you know,
Is only for us executively privileged.)

Let him who is stoned
Cast the first bunker buster

The meek and the weak
Shall inherit their own back cheek
(IOW, the poor always get sh*t)

Give onto Caesar,
That which is Caesar's.
Give onto me,
That which thou gave'th to Caesar.
For we are the ownership society,
And to us belong'eth dominion over the whole of the Earth.

Blessed are the PeaceMakers,
For they carry one heck of a payload.

Festival of the Miraculous Oil

Although often mis-labeled as the "Festival of Lights"

The Jewish Holiday of Hanukkah is actually a Story about Oil

It lasted. It lasted way longer than it was supposed to.

But on the Eighth Octet, it was gone. There was no ninth inning miracle.

Let us pray for long lasting miracles.

Melly Lemmy XMAS

Sermon from the Mouth

Ask not, ... Whether I can spy on you.

Ask whether you can

spy more on each other
(For sake of Your country and Before "They" do it to you).
(Think spying is bad? Nah. Don't think, Just do it [hat tip])

It is a far far better place ...
I take you to
Than yee have ever known.

It is far far better
peace I bring to you
than you dare to RIP upon yourselves.

Succumb not to the checks and balancing of the books.
Fuzzy math shall be your undoing.

Trust only in me.
I am the salvation.

I take you from the valley of Terrorism,
And bring you to the Mountain top of National Security.

I take you from the edge of Rejectionism,
And bring you to the safe landing of Global Economy.

Though you walk in the despair of Unemployment and Defeatism,
You shall have no fear,
For the Noble Cause is your destiny.

Do not let yourself become marginalized
along the road kill sidelines of History.

Do not let yourself become damned
by the Sad Damn (Who's Osama-oops Insane) truth.

There is only one truth.
I am the truth.
I am the law.
I am the glory.
I am your victory.
I am the mission acomplished.

Yes, you are in the last throes
of any rational thought.
Though verily you continue to question.

Fear yes my mixed messages for they shall set free your minds
From their bonds of rationality,
From their love of life and compassion for family.
I am your family.
The Republican State is your family.
We are United, Unquestionable and Indivisible.
Our life style is non-negotiable.
Our way is the way of all mankind.
God bless and God keep
(me in power).
Good Night and Amen.

BULLY-ist

Since

School- yard

daze

when he played with other Little Lemmin,

At the ole Element-Tree Institute
for young vermin,

George Jumpsoon was TERRIFIED

George was TERRIFIED of being called names.

He did not like it at all
when the head mistress called him a:

Say-damn-nist.

He did not like it at all
when the flat earth lemmlings called him a:

Rejection-NIST.

He did not like it at all
when the muscle boy called him a:

Girlie Lemm who cuts and runs like a coward.

George showed them all.
He joined the Ledge Edge Para-Jump Corps.
They practiced and practiced until their reaction
was a mindless matter of leader satisfaction.

When the Great Sitting Bush leader said "Geronimo !"
George was the first to Go.

No one called him names after that.
They simply honored his memory.

... everytime there was a veteran's day sale that is ....

Are you a RejectionNIST?

Hard enough it is to know if you are a Commie-Neck Nay-Bob

But how to tell if you are a Rejection-NIST?

NIST, as you know, is the National Institute of Standard Science and Technology

(1) IF you think that Global Warming is a Liberal Plot to stop Free Markets from exercising their legal dominion over Oil and Coal THEN YOU SIR are a RejectionNIST

(2) IF you think that _________ THEN YOU SIR are a RejectionNIST

Purifying the Dens of Infidelity

Islemm Allah is a simple, peaceful and humble lemming. He devoutly prays 5 times a day. He keeps himself clean. He wears white to prove his purity. He always stays away from temptuous she-lemms who seek to foul his immortal soul.

Recently it has been learned that infidels were spotted in the heartland of the faith. Islemm Allah has made a holy pledge to purify the dens of such infidelity.

Islemm Allah is a simple, peaceful and humble lemming. He devoutly prays 5 times a day. ...

Snatching Da Feet

In the cold commercial bluster
of Christmas next,
the Lost Lamb a human,
Cindy Crawford She-hen,
wanders the Earth
still in search of the "Noble Cause".

Where is it Mr.my. President? she begs.
The "Noble (Santa) Cause"?

Why did my begotten son die?
Is there no longer a Jolly White Knight
in the Unblemished North Pole
for us to believe in?
Has our DC Camelot become a Bizarro-world Cabaret?

GW keeps the deep dark answer under bulge.

Cowards, you see, are the ones who "Cut and Run". They become "marginalized" from the herd.
Only them who are Patriots act with courage and fearlessness.
The fearless ones give their right foot and then some for "The Cause".
(Santa's Cause)
Fearless moms take their sons back with pride and honor.
Unquestioning pride if the son comes back with no feet.
Unquestioning pride if the son comes back just as a pair of feet.
That you see ......
Is how we pull victory, oh glorious, from the jaws of the feet.
Did I mix message that one wrong way around?
Thinking is hard hard work.
Presidents don't do dumb stuff like that.
We have minions to do the fuzzy fuzz work of thinking.
Maybe we pull da feet from the jaws of the victor?

No biggie. The answer lies not under the flag draped box.

It lies elsewhere.

Nobility is as Nobility does.

Nobility starts on third base
and always rounds the cut corners
to get to its owning owner's
Home Sweet Home base.

Be at Peace Oh ig Noble ones.

Eco-Nomy iz Bea-u-tiful, War und Terror Bea-u-tiful, Every-ting Be-a-you-tiful

Vell-kommen, Bien-venue, Welcome!

Fremde, Etranger, Stranger.

Gluklich zu sehen, je suis enchante,

Happy to see you,

Bleibe, reste, stay.

Vill-kom-in, Bien-Venue, Welcome.

I'm Cabaret, au Cabaret, to Cabaret !

Leave you troubles outside!

So - life is disappointing?

Forget it!

We have no troubles here!

Here life is beautiful...

The girls are beautiful...

Even the orchestra is beautiful!

Outside it is winter.

But in here it's so hot.

Every night we have to battle with the girls to keep them from taking off all their clothings.

So don't go away.

Who knows? Tonight we may lose the battle!

We are here to serve you! And now presenting the Kit Kat Boys: Here they are! Boobby! Victor! Or is it Victor! and Bobby... You know, there's really only one way to tell the difference... I'll show you later. Hans (Oh Hans, go easy on the sauerkraut!) Herrman (You know what's funny about Herrman?) (There's nothing funny about Herrman!) And, finally, the toast og Mayfir, Fraulein Sally Bowles!

You have to understand the way I am, Mein Herr. A tiger is a tiger, not a lamb. Mein Herr. You'll never turn the vinegar to jam, Mein Herr. So I do... What I do... When I'm through... Then I'm through... And I'm through... Toodle-oo! Bye-Bye, Mein Lieber Herr. Farewell, mein Lieber Herr. It was a fine affair, But now it's over. And though I used to care, I need the open air. You're better off without me, Mein Herr.

Cunning Linguistic Politicking

The mammal- ian brain is open to suggestive program- ming by Cunningly-Crafted Language, Lies and Ideaological Imagery.

No wonder then that the corp.-passionate president of the humans displays himself in a 100% supportive room of dark-colored shirts despite 70% opposition by the general herd.

No wonder that he casts a terrorizing shadow called "The Enemy" and then projects subtext shadows of non-existant, "Sad-damn-ists", "Reject-a-nists" and "TERRROR-ists".

Fear and uncertainty are fodder for the mix messaged brain. The drums of war beat loudly and yet the humans see not its approach.

They march again lockstep towards the ledge.

Follow the Rum-full One

Donald likes to drink his own rum. We like him. He is so upbeat. We will follow him to the edge and beyond.

Shrine of the Incompetent Design

Many a Lemming in our commu -nity have joined The Church of the Incom- petent Designer.

They see clues.

They see clues everywhere.

They see evidence of a Creator who is careless, callous, clumsy, childish and cruel, in short, incompetent.

Take our solar system for example. What kind of competent creator would leave debris between Mars and Jupiter so that large asteroids would smack into Earth every 600 million years or so and extinguish essentially all life on the planet? And having seen it happen once, what kind of competent creator would let it happen again and again? Clearly our solar system, if not the Universe, is the handy work of an Incompetent Designer.

"Running out of" Milk, Bread and Oil

Four

Simple

Words:

"Running (1)

Out (2)

Of (3)"

"______" (4)

...

...

...

(You fill in the blank)

Got Milk? (a must see parody)

Got Bread? (French kind? Running out of money?)

Got Oil? (Vegetable, Mineral or Crude?)

Got a Rational Mind? (Liberal, Conservative, or Out of the Box?)

Got Water?

Got a Future?

...

The runner up to the prize, last word (Got what?) is so cliche that it almost puts one into a hypnotic trance. "Honey, we're running out of milk! Be a deer and run to the market for more, will you?"

Maybe it was "Bread" we were running out of, you know, the French kind you insist on finding in the pastry aisle of your supermarket next to the Let-Them-Eat-Cake bin.

Or maybe it was "Oil"? No difference. The market always provides. Supply and Demand. What ever kind do you need. What was it, mineral, vegetable or crude? Doesn't matter. It's in the oils, condiments and abiotics section. It's always there in full stock. Trust us. We, the mega-providers are here to serve you and take care of you. (Our selfish profit motives take a secondary back seat to what is best for you.) We are here to always give you what you need. No need to worry your pretty little brain. No need for Congressional oversight. It will always be here for you. Continue as always with your life. Stay the course!!!!

Hell, Lemmings do.

Exponential Thanksgiving

Dear Lord,

...

We thank thee for The Hockey Stick.

...

...

We thank thee for population growth.

...

We thank thee for ever-increasing demand for real estate.

We thank thee for ever-increasing demand for fuel.

We thank thee for dividing thy world into nobles and peasants

We thank thee for choosing us to be the noble "owners" of this "ownership society" and for giving us dominion over the non-owners.

We appreciate (with compound thanks) that ye hath provided us with multitudes of herd mentality masses to perform menial tasks for us and to buy fuel from us and to pay rent for the privilege of living on the real estate properties that we were born to possess.

We thank thee for having birthed us on third base so that we don't have to make "ultimate sacrifices".

We thank thee for having birthed us on third base so that we can afford those "thought tanking" minions (at the think tank insitutions) to help us keep the greater herd under control with use of framed manipulation of the mass thought process.

Amen.

...

Now let's invade that Turkey.

Cut and Run, Stage Right

Some pictures speak for themselves.

What was that about "cowards who cut and run"?

Dem Dem dummies aren't the only ones who don't know which door to head fir.

Ledge Pledge Babbylon

"Bully" comes only in Boy Color (supposedly).

"Bully" comes only in threatening threads of violence to be done (supposedly).

What does it mean to be "cut" from the herd?

Simply because you challenged the sound logic

of "Stay the Course"?

Simply because you would not adhere to your Man's Man Pledge

Of continuing with the Band of Boys over the Ledge?

...

...excertps from She-Lemm Jean's Bully Babble-ons:
"A Call from Colonel Danny Bupp ...
He asked me to send a message to Congress
"Stay the Course"
He also asked me to send
Congressman Murtha a message, that
Cowards Cut and run, Marines never do...
America and the rest of the World Want
Assurance from This Body
That We Will see This Through
....
[later]
My remarks were not directed at any member of the House
I did not intend to suggest
... that they apply most especially to the distinguished gentleman from Pennsylvania
I ask unanimous consent that my words be withdrawn
[Accordingly my bell is hereby "unrung"]

Advancing to the Edge

George L. Jumpsoon
lives a bit up the road
from his neighbors,
the Flintstems and the Bumbleheads.

George thinks of himself as being
a bit more "evolved" than those
backroad rodents down the hill.

George is a science simpleton.
He thinks "evolved" means "advanced".
He thinks he whizzes around in a
"High Tech" vehicle, a transport means that tells everyone,
George has "arrived".
This is the Jumpsooner Generation.
Everyone is Globally Interconnected by our Flattened
Tunnels of ever expanding Prosperity.

No one told George his High Tech Vehicle rolls on four wheels.
Just like the older ones of his Neanderthal neighbors.
He is no better. He just thinks he is.
No one told George that "evolved" means he is a random freak of nature.

Pesty Price Noises

Voles are Vocal.

We meet in our holes.

And make important noises.
Noises that increase the Prosperity
of our Civilized Labyrinths of Wealth.

See Barney and Betty-bye Bumblehead.
See them making price noises.
Betty wants to burrow more.
"The deeper we dig ourselves into a hole," she says, "the wealthier we will be."

The prices of holes in the ground
have always gone up.
No Lemming has lost out by staying the course.
Once you dig yourself into a quagmire, you keep digging.
That is the sense of the commons (common scents).
No one argues with common scents.

Buy it All Barney

Fred Flintstem's friend is a gullible, lovable bumble head.

They call him Buy-it-All Barney.

He can't help himself.

He was programmed from birth for one, and one function only, compulsive consumption of all things advertised.

Buy-it-All believes The Markets will always provide.
They always have.
Cars, planes, trains, ...
Luxurious homes for the stars ....
All plasticized and rasterized ...
Where does it all come from? All this Prosperity?
Barney doesn't care. The Markets provide.

Intelligent Redesign of History

A Story for

Li''ll Lemm -lings

Ta Learn From:

Brave Billy the Goat recalls a moment of

Courage and Decisiveness in his Life. It is important to never mis-rememberize what actually happened.

Brave Billy was doing some "hard hard" readin after having graduated with distinction from theNo-Prince-Left-Behind Program at the National Guard Academy for Noble-Cause Cousins & Cronies.

Suddenly from a leftist corner there appeared another with Bad Bad news. WTC7 had gone straight down even though no plane had hit it. What to do?

Billy pondered and pondered. Then he realized the kind folk that done put him in power were even dumber than he.

So after many minutes of sweat, anxiety and ponderin; Billy the Goat made a Decisive move. He got up and run.

The moral of the story, Little Lemmlings is this: We can always Intelligently Redesign History.

Knowing One's Place

Willbee-mother FlintStem, or Wilma as she is better known at the Lemming Community Center, knows her place in Lemming Society.

The LemmLord Intelligently Designed her Body to be a Birther of little Lemmlings, to be a Nurturer of Family Values, and to be an Unwavering Lover of the Life Tribal.

After all, the Lemm Commandments command each "One" of us to "Be". And to "Continue" And to "Stay the Course" (Deviate not from thy Directed Direction).

And To Remain True To The Tribe .

Wilma lives her life accordingly and lets others do so also. Live and let live, she always says.

Element-Tree Education

Fred FlintStem is a rock solid member of our Lemming Lodges.

He knows what he knows.

He knows what his five common senses prove to him to be the truths of this Universe.

Just as there are 5 common senses, there are 5 elements: Earth, Sky, Fire, Water and Trees. It is elementary. Every Element-Tree School graduate knows it. We hold these truths to be self evident.

The Earth, of course, is our home and source of mineral wealth.

The Sky is a pie-in-the-eye dream.

Of the last three, the most important are the Trees. Without trees there would be no Fire. Without trees, the rain Waters would flood our Labyrinths of Prosperity.

Fred heard rumors of a Terrifying "Peak Tree" Theory. Someone said we might soon start running low on trees. Fred scampered up to the top of his hole and perched himself on his hind feet. He looked. He listened. He smelled.

His trusty snout smelt the succulent odor of fresh vegetation. It was as powerful a signal as any Petro-age Humanoid might smell when whiffing in fresh vapors at an all night gasoline station. It was still all there. The "Peak" theory was another freak story. Fred's FlintStem brain assured him that the source of life, the source of our Prosperity, would be with us for a long time. No need to worry. No need to fret. Everything is Matada.

"Stay the Course" is what our Lemming leaders tell us.

Fred is a stick-to-it guy and proud of it. In the Lemming Army he learned the Core 4C's: Commitment, Consistency, Courage, and Cooperation. Even if it seemed that the ledge loomed near, a Lemming-Trooper stays the course. The herd stays on its path. We stand our ground. It's a philosophy that has never been wrong before.

Those who profess this "Peak" freak fright stuff are not using their 5 common senses that is for sure. Any Lemming can go up top and smell the forest. Nothing like the smell of fresh palm on a Sunday morning.

Dancing in our Dens

Time too much has been spent
on the Human Animals and their Travails

One might fall into the
Illusion That "They" are the Center of the Universe.

Well known it is though,
Lemmings are the Center of the Universe.

We ruled the Earth. It was constructed for us.

The Intelligent Design of
Our Labyrinths of Prosperity
Prove the Point.

Happy Times are Here Again in the West Culture Digs
We prepare to give thanks for the Bounitful Harvest
of Consummmable Goods and Goodies
passed down to us from the "Invisible Claw".

Fred FlintStem and his neighbor Brainless Barney
are this day celebrating with their She-Lemms,
Will-be-mother and Bettie-bye,
the glorious coming of the Retail Splurge Season,

Merry Times are wished for All.
And to all a Merry Mindless Mortgage Engorgement Season!!!

Panic Dem Dummies

Here at the A-sy-lum, I likes to play wit de other inmates.

I likes to kep em in a constant state of panic.

De utter day I freak'd em wit stories about how's I see terrorrrrists everywhere.

They gone wild. It gave me power. It gave me control capital to spend over dem.

Today I decided to play a new panic angle. My friend, Range Rover calls it panic politics. It's a hoot.

Speaking of hoot, We decided this one was from the birds. Ya all panic now. That there avionic influence-zooma is a coming. Rapture is coming. Yee hah. Get along you Panic-strucken Dem Dummies. Do my bidding oh minions of mine

Peaking Blood Clots

Oil is to Modern Civilization, As blood is to the Human Body.

Both fluids serve as transports of energy to vital organs of the system.

Both fluids help to supply vital nutrients for sustaining "growth" and "repair".

Without sufficient flows, The system (Body or Civilization) "Collapses".

Does it makes sense to argue about the exact time and date of expected Collapse while the system is still alive but suffering from a chronic and increasing clogging of its pipelines?

Don't argue.

Rush in for Bypass Surgery.

Bypass use of Fossils. Switch to Renewable Energy Sources.

Economics 1-0-1

When trouble is near, Protect your vital assets.

Minions of the Manipulative Minority

Managing Empire is hard hard work.

It can be much too much for the privileged elite.

Luckily, there are many a minion available and eager to serve.

Why do the minions serve?

That is a complex question.

More importantly, how do the minions assure the collapse of their civilization?

That is a much simplar process to understand. The minions must deceive two groups, those above them and those below them.

The elite above must not come to suspect that something is going horribly wrong below.

The wretched peasants below must not come to suspect that something is going horribly wrong above.

Only then, can the minions survive, secured in their position on the pyramid, between the powerful elite above and the deluded masses below.

A Simple Pledge

I pledge Allegiance to the "Wealth" Symbol ($$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$ $$$$$$) of the United Wealth-hoarding States of AdamSmithia;

And to the Republican Ideologies which they stand for, One Globalized-slave Nation under their required God, invisibly-handed, with Liberty and Justice for All the Haves and Have-More's.

And in case you forgot, the obsolete original:

I pledge allegiance to the Flag of the United States of America and to the Republic for which it stands , one nation under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Understanding Peak-Oil: The Giraffe's Story

We at the Lemming Institute for Geo-rooted Healthy Thought (LIGHT) detect a lack of understanding by most human creatures concerning this "Peak Oil" phenomenon.

It is very simple.

We will let our friend, Piqued Giraffe, tell his story.

"Dear Humans,

Yes it is simple, ... sad, ... but true. I was out in the forrest with my friend, Sino the Giraffe. We were all grazing happily, in a dream like state.

Suddenly, Sino and I bumped tongues. We were reaching for the last of the low-hanging leaves. We frantically looked around. There were no more low-hanging leaves. This was it. The last of the low hangers.

We jostled. I grabbed what I-coulda Rack up in my mouth. Sino lopped off the other half of what was left.

Well that was it. Then I started kind of jumping, practicing if you will. Sino started practicing his jump too.

We each knew. He who jumps higher and harder wins the race for the lowest of the jump-reachable leaves.

We stopped being friends. Yes it is simple, sad, but true.

But need I tell you?

Church of the Holy Hockey Stick

Scientists at the Lemming Institute of Global Hubristic Thinking (LIGHT) have long understood that species enter a resource over-shoot situation when their population enters the fast rising part of the exponential "hockey stick".

A good example is found from the study of the reindeer of St. Matthew Island.

It therefore utterly amazes us lemmings when the humans establish a religous church to welcome the coming of the glorious ascent up the hockey stick handle. Are they all dumb, or is it just a devout subpopulation among them that is so dumb?

They call their church "Economics". They call their ascent up the Stairway of Doom, "Growth" or "Progress" or "Consumerism" or "WEALTH".

They have scientists, yet they do not hear the warnings.

They have leaders incapable of making midcourse corrections (a.k.a. "incapable leaders"), leaders who insist that death is triumph, leaders who "stage their stooges" in place of truth, leaders who stage themselves as Jimmy-Carter look alikes, leaders who do not understand that "Economics" is not a real science but rather a "social science", a set of fictional games invented in the minds of the overly optimistic humans (and regretably yes, also in the minds of our great Lemming Leaders) .... (wow there is no end to this list) ...

[More to come ... still under construction. Graph is from IER site ]